I spent my 30’s on instagram: part one

I spent my thirties on Instagram and what a wild ride it has been. From free products arriving in the mail almost daily, to being flown around the world, to the rise and fall of Instagram yoga celebrities. I was part of the beginning when there was an essence of innocence and I was there when big legging companies creeped in like ivy in a forest to strangle out the trees that had been frolicking about. I’ve watched yogis join the monster, fight the monster and been wiped off Instagram by the monster. At the end of the day, I don’t know if there is even a monster since we are all the fuel to their engines anyways.

I don’t know if there is a right or wrong anymore, or if the question is more who is right or wrong for you individually.  Regardless, this is my story from start to now of a decade dedicated to the monster.  Everything has changed, and at the same time absolutely nothing has.

The Manifestation Era

This story begins before the beginning when I first moved to Maui. I moved to Maui with my first love. The sort of love that when all is said and done you don’t know if it was true love or that they twisted your naïve heart so much you thought it was something it wasn’t. None the less the heart shattered and left a girl feeling very much alone in the world. Luckily that world was Maui, so how bad could it be? My first big kid job out of college was for This Week Publications on Maui. I had a blast running around the island getting new advertising clients for the tourist publications. I always had contra or trade with restaurants to throw around. I was rookie of the year for the Hawaiian islands and even landed a huge account with Quicksilver. I felt like a big kid in my business clothes and flying to Oahu all of the time. I had my own restaurant review column in the Maui publication and modeled for client advertisements sometimes. A pretty exciting life for a 22 year old that was emancipated at 17 and put herself through college. My dad chopped down the trees on a patch of land in the country and built the cabin we all crammed into and he still resides in to this day. We were rich by no means and poor by most standards.

I would go on to get recruited by the marketing department for the city of Kapalua who hosts the LPGA. From there I would work for radio and even co-host a rock radio show. I was recruited from radio to work in the creative department for Naish International and that would conclude my corporate reign where typically I was the youngest in my departments.

Backtracking to the first job for This Week Maui publications, I was heart broken sitting on the floor of my office breezing through other tourism magazines searching for potential new clients. I pause on a full page advertisement of a chef in a garden holding a fish and produce towards the camera. My mind drifted as it has the tendency to do into a colorful daydream.

The day dream is about who this mature smiling chef is in my mind. I craft that he is a family man. He goes to work and he creates beautiful farm to table food for folks then he comes home to his wife and kids (that was me in the day dream). He is wholesome and real like the image he portrays standing in the garden. He is simple in the sense that you get what you see, nothing hidden behind the pretty picture. And though I have many trials and errors, many failed attempts at dating and one movie star to boot till I make that day dream come true, the seed has been planted and unknowingly the garden has already begun to grow. I will marry that man one day. We will have two beautiful children. We will fall apart. We will burn it all to the ground twice for good measure. Then we will rise from the ashes and we will take what was meant to be ours. A family and a love that cannot be burnt to nothing because sometimes the ash and charcoal helps things grow back stronger and thrive more than ever before.

The Chaos Era

When I met the chef from the magazine five years after my day dream I didn’t know it was him. I had mostly forgotten my little day dream in my office. The man I met wasn’t the one I had imagined so it took me awhile to piece it together. At first I met him as someone my friend new and I was introduced to him in passing at the original Charlie’s in Paia (Willy Nelson’s favorite establishment back in the day).

Next, when I was laid off from corporate and went to calm my heart and mind on an upcountry farm I would meet him again as a chef that used to work on the farm and was best friends or sudo son of the farmer himself. Little did I know this was the farm and garden where the photo was taken for his full page private chef ad.  You would think I would have put it all together at this point, but alas, I am still in the naïve era. There was an undeniable chemistry between us that literally nothing could stop though the obstacles were as thick as weeds.

We had only been dating for a few weeks when I was off to Ethiopia for six weeks. That’s a sure way to make a young new rocky relationship conclude but we prevailed. As soon as I returned we moved in together. Shortly after I would get into a horrific surfing accident where he would save my life paddling me in and speeding me straight to the hospital. That is how I introduced him to my dad. I had him call my dad, tell him he was my boyfriend and that I had been in a very serious accident and I was in trauma two about to go into surgery.

Bed ridden days later I couldn’t shake the feeling that something was abnormal besides my torn apart leg. I crutched my way to the bathroom and sure enough three tests later, I was pregnant. Thus began our family.

The Innocence Era

Babies, gardens, tropical beaches and a handsome chef for a husband. Was this truly my life? The rugrat that used to staple her hand me down flip flops together between class periods in Jr. High? The girl so troubled she tried to run away and cross the border into Canada in highschool? I was on cloud nine walking barefoot through the yard under the monkey pod trees to the giant mango tree where I’d set my baby on blanket to sleep while I took my laminated ashtanga primary series and practiced it next to the garden. Yes, that was my life and it was pure joy. When I think of the absolute happiest times of my life, this is top of list.

We bought a house and moved to a different shore on Maui where I could walk down to the beach every day. Baby number two was on the way. I had exited from facebook and social media was non existent in my life. I knew nothing of Instagram. I used to just leave my phone on the table all day. I couldn’t be bothered to grab it if I was going to the beach or the store. Total detachement and totally in love with my life.

I remember so clearly when my husband told me I should get an Instagram account. What is Instagram I asked? It is a way to share photos with people. Then we can share the kids photos with our family (who all lived an ocean away). I was convinced. That is how my Instagram story begins. It was photos of sunrises, babies and my yoga practice which I had become a staple in my life. It had become part of the calming and recovery force of this era.

I didn’t know yoga was such a thing on Instagram, and I’m not sure at that point how much of thing it really was. I guess that is why I have a following at all…I got to the table early. The first yoga account that I followed that wasn’t someone I knew was @laurasykora. I found her because my friend had forwarded me an email that had photos of Laura doing yoga with her toddler daughter and my friend had said that we should take photos like that someday with my newborn baby girl.

As a young stay at home mom, yoga, Instagram and the yoga community on Instagram became inspiration and socialization. I consider my first community on Instagram to be great friends in my life like @natashaswinter, @casa_colibri and @coffeeand rainbows. Even though I grew up with @yogitales we were never close friends until we found each other on Instagram with a mutual love for yoga and would end up traveling to see each other and take our very first training together.

Instagram Yoga Celebrities truly felt that way to me. When I connected @laurasykora with my local studio and she came to Maui to teach workshops I was star struck! As I connected with more and more of this Instagram community my following started to sky rocket. It was all for love and yoga and we were learning so much from one another. I was in love again, this time with the practice of yoga. I think it is obvious to say that things got way out of control and it doesn’t take long for the rabbit and deer (seemingly innocent) to see that bounty growing in the garden and find a way in to take it all for themselves. But those times were pretty fun and pure and the marketing machine that is now Instagram hadn’t quite come into play yet.

The Celebrity Era

My following began to grow. A few of us on Instagram started hosting challenges with the Instagram yoga community. A challenge would have a theme like “arm balances” and there would be a pose a day presented by your host. There was a time I was doing so many challenges I needed a calendar dedicated to them. Marketing began to creep in with prizes. A company would be the sponsor of the challenge and would donate, for example, a pair of leggings to the winner of the challenge selected by the hosts. Often the hosts would be given free (leggings for example) items to promote during the duration of the challenge. This got to the point that almost daily I would receive free products in the mail from leggings, to trapezes, to wheels to clothing of all sorts. Soon there was a calling for ambassadors. It felt like an achievement to be recruited as an ambassador. We never had to pay, things were thrown at us for free. But we were paid for our marketing of their products with stuff. Lots and lots of stuff. More stuff than anyone really needs. Who needs drawers of leggings really? Ambassadorships started getting sneaky. Now they were targeting those who wanted to be sponsored, but the ambassadorship meant you would get a big discount but you HAD to spend a certain amount of money on their products. BUT, you would get your own code to share with people! That is right: you would pay for their product and promote their product. It is evil genius really…convincing people to pay you to promote your product.

The Self Righteous Era

I was already starting to leave my cloud nine era and get resentful as I saw this monster growing. There was a point when I was flown to LA to do a photo shoot for a recycled legging company who didn’t recycle in their own home and after that trip I couldn’t stop ranting about the hypocrisy running rampant. That is when I decided to start my own legging line that was pure and true to the cause from the fibers to the customers. I was so fed up with these false ambassadorships and the really big monsters had started making their move at this point. Giant companies with money coming in with contracts and a marketing scheme that said if you follow, worship or join us you are the “it girl.” It felt more like mean girls to me. There was an uprising but money, lawyers and threats work fast against those that are only trying to stand up for what seems like the right thing to do. Apologies had to be issued or yogis trying to do what is right and stand up for those taken advantage of would be sued. Some Instagram celeberties left social media completely for this exact thing. You have probably forgotten them by now, but there was a time we were all trying to stand up for them and raise a go fund me for their lawyer bills as the insects came and chomped down their vibrant leaves until a stem was barely visible at the dirt.

Sigh, the incesticides are poison though and you can’t fight evil with evil is what we learned and life went on. Marketing became beyond normalized and now it is more marketing than anything else. What is real and true doesn’t seem to even matter anymore.

The Instagram Business Era

For the Instagram celebrity there seemed to be a certain success formula in the air. First you would grow to teach workshops. Then you would travel to workshops. I travelled (all expenses paid) as far as Spain to take a (free) training and host a paid workshop. Next you would host a retreat. Maybe you would dabble in producing an ebook. Possibly a print book. Trainings would follow. Or like myself, all of the above plus a clothing line. The only problem is, it is all linked to Instagram now. If you are irrelevant or fall in popularity, so does your business. The hustle is real.

To be continued…